Went out today to replace the cracked fuel line, which in any sane scenario is about a 90-second job, it's just a 5/16ths rubber fuel hose between a backflow valve and the intake of the fuel pump. Two clamps and boogedy boogedy let's go racing.
Apparently, I had installed the fuel pump before i put the manifold on, and the clamp on the line was facing into a blind corner where I could not get a screwdriver or a wrench or a pair of pliers or anything on it. In restrospect I probably could have applied more force to twist it around to where I could get at it, but the fuel pump itself is really easy to remove and I only tried a little until I figured I'd just take ten more minutes to take it off, replace the gaskets, put on the missing lock washers, and otherwise do it right. This I did.
How nice.
When all was properly and carefully reassembled, I went to start the car. Note "carefully". The fuel pump on this engine is the mechanical one, dead simple except that the pump lever can get stuck off to one side of the cam (run by an auxiliary cog and shaft off the timing belt) and miss out on all the cam action. I knew this and was as careful as I could installing it under the manifold with the hoses attached.
With all the fuel in the line having drained and the pump needing to prime, I got some carb cleaner to use as starting fluid and sprayed it fairly generously into the secondary. I cranked away and it caught and ran for a second, then died, and I sprayed some more and attempted to start it again. This time, it backfired and set the carb on fire, which immediately spread to the air filter pan.
I'm not a carb expert at all, my other cars are all fuel-injected. But I know enough from episodes of Roadkill and old John Deakin columns on AVWeb that when there is an intake fire, you just keep cranking until it goes out. So I did not let off the starter, and the car didn't start, and the fire just stayed, burning off the extra carb cleaner, and I was starting to get a little anxious when it backfired again and shot burning carb cleaner or fuel out all over and things began to get really exciting. I jumped out and in a panic tried to blow it out, and then realized the whole side of the engine was on fire under the manifold and the oil residue was starting to burn. In the space of two or three seconds the flames began to mount and were now rising to about halfway up the hood.
I ran back to the trunk to grab the fire extinguisher, and only when I got there did I realize I'd left the keys in the ignition. I darted back and grabbed them, opened the trunk, grabbed the fire extinguisher which is bungeed to the jack mount, and the bungee was tangled around the pin and the extinguisher mount. I managed finally to get it free, yanked the pin while running back to the front where the fire was smoking blackly and gave it a half-second burst which immediately put out the flames.
All this probably took about 30 seconds. Except for the scorched emergency hood release cable which had been lying across the edge of the air filter pan, there did not appear to be any damage except to my ego. There was cornstarch all over the engine and carburetor that I washed off with a hose. So the lesson here (which has not yet endeth) is that starting fluid is evil.
I took the pump off again and tested it, and it pumped fine, so it was pretty obvious that the aforementioned cam bypass problem had occurred. I spent about two hours trying to get that stupid pump positioned correctly, but every time for some reason the lever ended up on the side of the cam. I finally took the hoses back off and tried it that way, put the hoses and clamps on by touch, and that did the trick. I guess some tension from the hoses made it hard to align the pump properly, and I ended up pretty much back where I should have started, getting the intake clamp lined up correctly to tighten down. In retrospect I ignored a few key tenets - if it ain't broke, don't fix it, and starting fluid is pure malice. I could have probably gotten a pair of needlenose on the troublesome clamp and managed to turn it enough to get the screwdriver on it, but I got ambitious.
I decided to keep the 13" BWAs and got two new tires shipped from online to install at the cheap red place. Yesterday, I waited there a ridiculously long time to mount and balance tires on two loose wheels, with an appointment and all. They also refused to mount one of the existing tires (not old and not worn out, although the other one had suffered from the bad alignment from the old A-arm on that side) on the spare rim. I ended up going to the tire shop down the street and paying them cash to mount and balance the spare, which was not only less than the red place but they did it in about 6 minutes.
It also turns out that at some point some dolt who owns both Fiats and Mercedes mixed up Fiat and Mercedes lug bolts, which are different thread pitches, and this is likely the cause of my stripped left rear lug threads. I also had a bad one that had suffered abuse, but the threads chased up ok and I was able to torque it down.
This whole weekend was ridiculous and I am fairly annoyed with myself and that tire chain, but
all is well that ends well, the car did not burn down, and there was progress. So there it is.
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